Sunday, September 30, 2007

Plank in my Eye

While I jokingly complain about raising a tyke in a one-bedroom condo, the truth is that we've been pretty happy here. I take much pride in what I've done with the 800 square feet. I take even more pride in the lessons learned from living in such intimate quarters. And even as I have watched friend after friend move into their first homes and dream homes, I have never, ever, considered Tom and I to be roughing it. (A summer spent in a Mexican slum, where literally hundreds of families lived in shacks they built from salvaged trash, forever changed what I consider "poor".)

Yet the closer we get to the end of Tom's training (nine post-college years, most of which we've spent together), and the closer we get to moving into an actual house, the more I find myself daydreaming of what's to come: A porch. A fenced-in backyard. Two bathrooms. A pantry. A room for Nana and Papa to stay when they come to visit.

Meanwhile, Tom daydreams of sleeping, free time, and weekends spent at home.

What will we be doing this time next year? How different will our day-to-day life be? Today, as my thoughts had me in the clouds, reality tapped me on the shoulder. I remembered what my best friend told me after her boob job, a comment which, in my self-righteousness, I considered comical at the time. Though she was quite serious! She said to me, with a depressing sort of shock: "You know, these boobs haven't really changed my life. I'm still the same person." Well, duh, I thought at the time. But now... Why do I look at the speck of sawdust in my sister's eye, and pay no attention to the plank in my own eye?

2 comments:

Susie said...

I'm confused by this one. Are you thinking there's something wrong with looking forward to having a fenced back yard and two bathrooms?

Having lived in a variety of circumstances (no Mexican slums, but a barn once), my opinion is that your neighbors count more than your house when it comes to amenities ... but it's nicer to have the neighbor kids all playing in your fenced back yard than to have to chase them every second. It just kinda improves the quality of the moments watching them when they're in an environment that's suited to them and in which they can be pretty much independent. And two bathrooms, well, there's nothing wrong with wanting instant gratification nature calls, is there?

L said...

Nope, definitely nothing wrong with looking forward to two bathrooms. (Oh my gosh, what a dream!) And a fenced in backyard-- nothing to feel guilty about. My only problem is thinking that these things will change my life.

My fantasies of this time next year do not include PMS or cranky children or losing my keys-- as if moving from condo to house will magically morph me into a problem-free individual. Remembering my friend's comment that she was "still the same person" after her boob job seems suddenly pertinent to my situation. Which strips me of the self-righteousness I felt when I first heard her say that!