I’m wary of marriage advice that treats children as impediments rather than blessings. Thus I find myself defending things like the family bed or a lack of date night.
That being said: I do believe it’s possible to let children come between you and your spouse. I’ve seen it happen. Many times. Sometimes, I guess, it happens because the marriage was shaky even before babies. Other times, I imagine couples grow apart, and the kids are a nice distraction. Next thing you know you’re planning elaborate celebrations for your child’s birthday while your wedding anniversary goes by with little notice.
It’s easy to think “It could never happen to me.” Do people see the headlights before the train?
I don’t know. So I will watch my marriage with vigilance.
I want to honor my wedding vows in deed—and in heart. I want for Tom and me to have the sort of solidarity that our children can clearly see and, in that, find comfort and security. I want for Tom to still be my best friend fifty years from now. (Yeah, barf, but I mean it).
God, grant us health!