February 3, 2006
Still no dilation. Tom has scheduled an induction date sometime between 10 and 14 days after my due date, and he'll give me two hours warning when the time comes.
This has not been easy. On one hand, I know that normal gestation is any time between 38 and 42 weeks. On the other hand, I know that complications can occur starting 10 days past an accurate due date, and I know mine is accurate.
So let's assume that I don't go into labor before the induction date. The pitocin will require constant monitoring. Perhaps my hospital has telemetry, and I can still walk around? If I do have to stay put, who says that requires me to lie on my back? I can ask to be hooked up in an upright position, and if those monitors fall off as I move around, the nurses can put them back. That's what they get paid for.
Since pitocin contractions are more intense and frequent than natural ones, I'm going to ask that we begin with a low dose. Assuming I make progress, I will ask for the drip to be removed to see if my body takes up the contractions on its own.
All along, I've said that I will probably have an epidural if I have to be induced. I may. But the closer I get, the more determined I am not to.
While there's still a possibility of my going into labor spontaneously, it doesn't help me to think about that. I'm at a point when I need to grieve my laboring-at-home fantasy and make peace with other possibilities. I need to walk into the hospital with my head raised and heart ready.