I've decided to offer some soul food each Sunday. Though since I'm getting ready to leave town, this one's coming early:
“I love my husband more than my children,” the author said to Oprah’s shocked audience. I can’t remember the mother’s name or even the name of her book, but you know what? I agreed with her.
That was before Peter was born. Now, a couple years later, I…
Still agree. I’d put things another way, of course. I don’t quantify the love I have for family members—I love them all fully, in different ways—but I appreciate the woman’s point: the primary relationship in a family is that of the parents.
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). My child has my genes, my blood, but I am not one flesh with him. I am one flesh with my husband, and he with me. One day Peter will leave our nest and, God willing, be made one flesh the person of his choosing to begin a family of his own.
Still, the immense caretaking a child requires can sometimes make my marriage feel secondary. Peter is with me twenty-four hours a day. Tom, on the other hand, usually works 80 hours a week. How do I meet my child’s needs while retaining the primacy of my marriage?
That’s a sticky wicket. Seriously. And I’m going to talk about it all this week.