Monday, April 16, 2007

Changing Times

“Changing Peter is like trying to give a lion a rectal exam,” said Tom, after diapering our then six-month-old.

Those were the good old days. Now Peter is stronger, more determined, and loud as a siren. I’m willing to bet our neighbors have considered calling DHR.

“Try singing to him,” the books say. “Offer him a toy. Make eye contact and turn it into a pleasant interaction.” Yeah, right. I’ve sung so many rounds of Old McDonald, I’ve run out of animals. Appropriate ones, anyway. Peter’s going to think that tigers and dinosaurs live on the farm.

We’ve had the most luck with crackers. Is that a choking hazard? Is that using food for reward? I don’t care. It works. At least 75% of the time.

That other 25%? We’ve had some ugly interactions. Let’s just say I’m not about to win Mother of the Year.

But Peter’s antics have inspired an awesome creation: the clear-vinyl pad cover. You could put your great-grandmother’s hand-embroidered pillow case on top of the changing pad, with this to protect it:

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I just wish vinyl were an easier sewing medium. I won’t be marketing these anytime soon.

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